Incompatible

I like dark chocolate. I like dark chocolate with peppermint (my daily hot cocoa). I like dark chocolate with peanut butter (my Grams’ chocolate peanut butter balls at Christmas). I do NOT like chocolate with fruit. Don’t fruit my chocolate. I know some people enjoy fruit and chocolate, but for me they are incompatible.

One definition I found for incompatible: two things so opposed in character as to be incapable of existing together. OK, saying fruit and chocolate are incompatible may be an overstatement. It’s my preference. One of my nieces, however, is highly allergic to peanuts. Traces of peanuts can send her into anaphylactic shock and land her in the hospital. My niece and peanuts are incompatible.

Another image that came to mind is a toy I had as a kid. It was the roundish ball with holes in different shapes made by Tupperware. Trying to fit the square shape through the round hole doesn’t work. The two shapes are incompatible.

Today as we reach the peak of the theme of taming our tongues, James specifies two things that are always incompatible.

9 With it [the tongue] we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God. 10 From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so. 11 Does a spring pour forth from the same opening both fresh and salt water? 12 Can a fig tree, my brothers, bear olives, or a grapevine produce figs? Neither can a salt pond yield fresh water.[1]

James 3:9-12

A common sermon illustration is of a family who is getting ready for church, yelling at the kids, arguing with the spouse, and then coming to church with smiles and worshipping God. I know I have often made excuses for my sinful words – critical words, angry words, words of gossip, prideful words, words of complaint - but these verses stop me in my blame shifting tracks.  James says, “these things ought not to be so.” They are incompatible. They are so opposed in character that they should not exist together. They are not fitting for one who is in Christ.

Let’s take a closer look. The “highest, purest, most noble” (Moo) way that we can use our tongue is to bless, praise, and honor God. “The blessing of God was a prominent part of Jewish devotion. ‘The Holy One, Blessed be He’ is one of the most frequent descriptions of God in rabbinic literature and ‘the eighteen benedictions’, a liturgical formula used daily, concluded each of its parts with a blessing of God.”[2] As Christians, we also bless God in prayer and song in corporate worship and hopefully in our personal lives.

James contrasts this highest, purest, most noble use of the tongue with its opposite, the lowest, foulest, most dishonorable use of the tongue: curse people who are made in the image of God. We tend to think of cursing as synonymous with swearing. In the ancient world, swearing might be included in cursing, but cursing extended far beyond simply swearing at someone. To curse a person was to long for them to be isolated from God and suffer eternal punishment. We might understand this today as wishing someone to go to hell as hell is eternal separation from God and eternal punishment.

James highlights the sinfulness of cursing people by describing them as “made in the likeness of God.” People are unique in God’s creation because they are His image bearers. You may be thinking, “I haven’t wished hell on anyone lately, so I’m good.” I think that misses James’ point. The past few weeks we have been weighing how we use our tongue for destruction. It is a world of unrighteousness. It is impossible to tame on our own. The tongue reflects what is in our hearts (Matthew 15:11). Numerous sinful words spew from our mouths and yet, we praise our Holy God with the same mouths. It ought not to be so!

Blessing and cursing are incompatible, but James is also illustrating the inconsistency of our tongues. Like the doubting person who is double-minded and unstable, the one who blesses and curses is inconsistent. They vacillate between words of blessing and words that are a world of unrighteousness, words of life and words of destruction. The tongue displays its hypocrisy.

James uses illustrations from nature combined with rhetorical questions to show how ridiculous this inconsistency is. Springs were critical in the dry lands of Israel. Villages depended on the fresh water. Springs are consistent. They are not fresh water one day and salt water the next, and then back to fresh water. Likewise, a fig tree is consistent to produce figs not olives or mangos or peaches. And a fig will never grow on a grapevine. A fig tree will only produce figs. A grapevine will only produce grapes.

An interesting note: The ESV translates the Greek word pikros as salt water, but it’s meaning is bitter. Fresh water and bitter water do not come from the same spring. Vice versa, a salt pond cannot yield fresh water.

Douglas Moo gives a helpful summary: “so the pure heart cannot produce false, bitter, harmful speech… only a renewed heart can produce pure speech; and consistently (though not perfectly) pure speech is to be the product of the renewed heart.[3]

Last week, we learned the paradox that we must tame our tongues, but we cannot tame our tongues apart from God. God can control what we cannot. Our sanctification including the taming of our tongues is not left solely on us. God is completing the work He has begun in us, but at the same time, we have a responsibility. What do we do?

First, confess when our tongues our inconsistent and incompatible with who we are in Christ. Second, rest in the truth that even when our tongues are inconsistent and incompatible with who we are, our standing before God remains the same. Jesus’ words were always wise, fitting, consistent, and compatible. He took the sin of our inconsistent and incompatible tongues and bore God’s wrath in our place and gave us His perfect record of taming the tongue.

Third, pray and ask God for help. “Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips” (Psalm 141:3)!

Fourth, in love and gratefulness, by the Holy Spirit’s power, put off the sinful ways you use your tongue and put on words that glorify God and edify others. You can do additional study, but here are a few verses that depict a tamed tongue, a tongue that is consistent and compatible with who we are in Christ, a tongue that evidences genuine faith.

“Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving” (Ephesians 5:4).

“Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear” (Ephesians 4:29).

“Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person” (Colossians 4:6).

“The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life; but the mouth of the wicked conceals violence” (Proverbs 10:11).

“Truthful lips endure forever, but a lying tongue is but for a moment” (Proverbs 12:19).

“All the words of my mouth are righteous; there is nothing twisted or crooked in them” (Proverbs 8:8).

“Whoever guards his mouth preserves his life: he who opens wide his lips comes to ruin” (Proverbs 13:3).

“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs of anger… A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit” (Proverbs 15:1, 4).

“Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body” (Proverbs 16:24).

“Whoever restrains his words has knowledge, and he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding. Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent” (Proverbs 17:27-28).

“A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver” (Proverbs 25:11).

Reflection

1.     Identify specific ways your words are inconsistent and incompatible with who you are in Christ? Do you see patterns? Are there certain people or circumstances where you are prone to be hypocritical in how you use your words (i.e., we speak one way in public or at church but differently at home)?

2.     From the above verses and/or your own study, what does a tamed tongue sound like? What are the effects?

3.     If you identified specific ways your tongue is not tamed (Reflection 1), what are specific ways you can begin taming your tongue? Examples: You are critical of co-workers. Each day thank God for something about each co-worker and your job.

You speak angry and defensive words when you are criticized. Be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to anger (James 1:19). Bless them in tangible ways and pray for them (Luke 6:28).

[1] The Holy Bible: English Standard Version (Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles, 2016), Jas 3:9–12.

[2] Douglas J. Moo, James: An Introduction and Commentary, vol. 16, Tyndale New Testament Commentaries (Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 1985), 132.

[3] Douglas J. Moo, James: An Introduction and Commentary, vol. 16, Tyndale New Testament Commentaries (Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 1985), 134–135.