Wounded and Crushed

When I was younger, I remember watching older people hold a book or a paper farther away or closer to their eyes in order to see it clearly. Sometimes it was like a mixed-up conveyor belt as the book or paper got moved out and then back in and back out some more. Now I’m fifty, and the past year especially I have noticed a change in my vision. I am the one moving my book or iPad in and out until the words come in to focus.

The Holy Spirit does the same thing for us through Scripture, circumstances or other people. We have sin or struggles in our life that we don’t see clearly. According to Matthew 7:3 sometimes it isn’t just fuzzy vision but complete blindness to a log in our own eye.

This week part of my quiet time was reading Isaiah 53:5. It is a verse that can bring about pinpoint focus.

But He was wounded for our transgressions; He was crushed for our iniquities.

Maybe you are wondering what made this a focusing verse to me. Think about your day today? Did you sin? Was there something in your thoughts? Did it come out of your mouth? Did you act in sin? A friend of mine said she has shared in a group of Christian women some of her struggles with sin, and that the ladies looked at her like she was crazy. First, they thought that as a Bible teacher and more that she wouldn’t sin. Second, they didn’t that think they sin. This goes against 1 John 1:8.

If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us.

Matthew 7:3 illustrates our blindness to our own sin, but I also believe that because we constantly compare ourselves to “much worse” sinners, we minimalize our sin until we think we have no sin.

In contrast part of a Puritan prayer confesses:

My iniquities are great and numberless,

But Thou art adequate to my relief,

for Thou art rich in mercy;

the blood of Thy Son can cleanse from all sin;

the agency of Thy Spirit can subdue my most powerful lusts.[1]

The author recognized that his sin was great, even beyond counting, but God’s mercy and grace were more – always sufficiently more. If our transgressions, iniquities and sin were not great, why did Jesus need to be wounded and crushed for them? Why did He have to suffer and die? My sin, your sin, is so serious and great that it required Jesus’ perfect obedience and then atonement for us to be reconciled to the Father. That’s the focusing aspect.

Monday, I finished reviewing the lesson for youth group. It was primarily from Matthew 6:21-30. I was reminded that being angry in my heart is just as deserving of judgment as murder. Nothing new. I’ve read numerous Biblical counseling books on anger. I’ve counseled people on anger. I’ve had to deal with ways I struggle with anger. But not five minutes later in a discussion with my husband, I got irritated that he didn’t seem to be listening. I got angry. Of course, I wanted to justify it, blame-shift, but the bottom line was that I sinned. I didn’t just sin in my outward tone, but I sinned in my heart. I was thinking of myself, what benefited me, the attention I was due, etc. That is one circumstance in one day. My iniquities are great and numberless. To ignore or deny that is to make light of Jesus’ suffering and death.

My sin/your sin ➜ Jesus’ wounds, crushing, suffering, death

We get complacent with our sin because we do compare ourselves to others. For instance, on Monday, I didn’t swear. I didn’t yell. I didn’t throw things. My harsh tone isn’t really sin in comparison. But God is holy. My standard is God and His Word, not other people. My iniquities are great and numberless.

This may seem discouraging and it should to a point. It should help us see that our “righteousness” will never be enough (Isaiah 64:6). We should grieve that we sin against our holy God. We need a Savior. Recognizing our sin should drive us humbly, gratefully to God to rest in Jesus’ perfect work on our behalf. Admitting we still sin even as Christians is good news because in Christ, we already have the remedy. We tend to think of the Gospel as just for salvation, but every day we sin. Every day we need the Gospel. The Gospel is for salvation and sanctification.

John Bunyan wrote, “Will you love sin more than grace, and darkness more than light? Will you shut your eyes to Him but open them wide for the pleasures of the flesh?” We might not think we are loving sin more than grace or shutting our eyes to God, but we do just that when we say we have no sin.

Sometimes I grow weary looking at my sin. I wonder if there is any fruit in my life or if I will ever have complete victory over certain sins. But then I look at Jesus. I look at the cross. I rest in the truth that there is forgiveness (1 John 1:9), that I can find mercy and grace at the throne of grace (Hebrews 4:16), and Jesus’ righteousness is mine in Christ (2 Corinthians 5:21).

Reflection:

• Ask God to help you search your heart for any unconfessed and/or unrecognized sin (Psalm 139:23-24).

• Review verses about God’s forgiveness, mercy and grace.

• Pray about being more transparent (as appropriate) about some of your sin. You choosing to share with someone else might be the encouragement and grace they need to check their own heart for sin and to rest in Jesus’ forgiveness, mercy and grace.

[1] The Valley of Vision: A Collection of Puritan Prayers & Devotions, Edited by Arthur Bennett